journal d'une transition

828

I don’t know; it isn’t clear yet… … The water-situation is a big question. We are only about 600 people in Auroville. We have planted and planted, wherever we could, mainly to recreate a balanced environment, and to attract and retain water in the soil; but also to provide for harmony, for an atmosphere of beauty and sweetness. Is it all bound to go to waste? I can’t believe it; there has to be some subtle action, so that this entire place is truly claimed by the Lord, despite the small human mediocrity on the surface…! *9-2-1989, Auroville: Today is Diane’s birthday; that has triggered of course thoughts of Auragni, and the same interrogation, although it has now been cleared of its drama and of most of its pain… It is also the day, Jacques the dentist told me this morning, Nostradamus in his prophecies had predicted to be the last day of the “Kali Yuga”…! *10-2-1989, Auroville: I have by now received two telegrams from C regarding Krishna’s papers, and both are rather confusing; it doesn’t seem possible for Krishna not to go… This morning he worked with me in the garden; it is a good thing that we work together; yet it does take adjustments in the energies; he still wastes and talks too much and is too tense. But besides what there always is between the two of us, in You, there is also a growing inner unity among the four of us, Su, Gopal, him and me… And I feel happy about it. *12-2-1989, Auroville: I am sort of hanging in a quiet confusion… It feels like waiting for a further degree of Presence and of Force, waiting in a clumsy, barely redeemed stance, for a channelling down, an animation: the lack is concrete, and its very concreteness may be a sign of that fulfilling concreteness to come… It is clear one cannot ask for oneself; it is clear one cannot really progress by one’s own efforts either. There is offering and courage in accepting to remain empty… *13-2-1989, Auroville: N insisted that I come with him to see the small piece of land he has recovered from relatives in Sanjeev Nagar, where he now wants to move: taking down his hut in Edayachavadi and building a new hut on that spot; it may be a better village, I am not sure; he may have less troubles there, being on his own land, and there’s a school for his kids, and work opportunities for his wife; I’ll try and help him… … Besides some sleepiness the last two days, I’ve had like a string or a series of insights – what one could call revelations -, that came to strengthen, ground and illumine my comprehension of the way; I feel no need to fix them into formulae; it is wonderful, part of the Pressure and Its gift… There is rather a growing need to break through lower down, so that a solidity of Force may manifest… Still, as often in the past, I see that a single of these insights could give rise to a religion, if blown out of proportion and… “context”; and I am grateful for the silent, discreet and humble construction of the new being and of its new world…!