journal d'une transition

806

external movements and expressions. And because I do not find it, I tend to feel scattered and noisy and shallow and, in the end, quite useless – in contradiction with what I wish to manifest…

*2-9-1988, Auroville: Su was crying like a child because of the language barrier, trying to understand and participate in the talk with C… … Yesterday at the Raja Sabha the Bill was passed, despite a loud opposition to Rajeev Gandhi, for Auroville. I do not understand clearly at all what all this Bill means and implies, but it sets Auroville as a venture of national importance and makes it a Foundation, directly relatable to the Central Government of India; perhaps simply out of ignorance, I must say I feel nothing much one way or another, at this point… *5-9-1988, Auroville: Today I haven’t seen Krishna; he’d started to bring flowers every day at dawn, so I’d know he’s alright and I don’t have to check on him; but the relationship had lately got so, externally, that it was beginning to slip – the old point when he begins to over-extend and brings too much noise and energy… … When I drove through the village this evening, with C, on our way to visit with Jaïmurthy’s family, I saw that N was getting himself nicely drunk… I haven’t been able yet to break his allegiance to those energies that feed from continuous drama… … The Foundation Bill is to be passed in the second Chamber today or tomorrow; it doesn’t sound that good! It seems to mean direct management by a Government constituted body, an awful perspective…! *9-9-1988, Auroville: We have got copies of the Bill that has been passed in the Parliament for the Auroville Foundation: some of the clauses are likely to be misused, and the old administrative machinery can very well crush us all; but the main point remains that the Central Government of India is now legally, openly and officially committing itself to serve the Charter of Auroville, and also to acquire thereby all lands, funds and assets, as well as all legal formations in the name of Auroville, whether from the SAS or from the Aurovilians….

*10-9-1988, Auroville: C has offered Rs 5,000/- to help finish all the carpentry work at “Ravena”; Larry was happy, and it was a relief not to have to lay off the workmen, so close to completion of the work…

*11-9-1988, Auroville: C and I left late morning for the airport to receive R and we returned this evening. … I am grateful to You. There is no cause for this gratitude: it is one with the awareness of You…