with Sri Ganesh

- 02-08-08:

Yesterday I sent an e-mail to the Secretary to invite him personally to visit here at any time of his choice; oddly, behind his insufferable, rude and unintelligent public persona, I seem to sense an awkward child with a heart that is yearning… But, as on a previous occasion, he may simply ignore my letter… Also yesterday, I happened to meet Luca on the occasion of Arjun’s birthday, and he reminisced for me what he had known and understood of Panditji of Rameshwaram, how he had been one of the highest authorities in the whole country on all matters of religious knowledge, even though he was the last of a specific tantric line (Amrit had refused to succeed him and it was his own wife who continued after his passing until her own demise, leaving no successor behind them), and how he knew all about properly installing a deity, how to invoke its presence, and every one of the numerous steps which must be observed by a honest and conscientious Pujari… What could I say…!? But I also recall that on one of his visits to the Ashram, Panditji had been taken to visit this shrine of Sri Ganesh (this was before Kusum had begun to serve) and been asked what to do in order to satisfy Sri Ganesh’s needs, as there was no one competent enough here, or something to that effect; and that Panditji had answered very confidently: “Oh, Ganeshji will take care of it… Don’t worry…!” I grope in utter ignorance and I have no way to verify whether what I experience as a developing contact and perception is of any real value and quality… I only have this rather childlike trust in Your words that, according to Your experience, even though the traditional approach is perfectly respectable, the experience in its full dimensions can also be had through the direct approach from the heart… And, besides, I must also trust that Kusum’s insistence on choosing me was guided from within or above and corresponded to more than the mere fancy of her sentiments for me… However, I do not demand to know the answer; I only pray that, if it is a delusion, or if it in anyway does disservice, then I must be pulled away from this… (This is related by Mother Herself in Her Agenda…) But the fact remains that no one has taught me.

Sri Ganesh, In Peace you sit In the heart of this world,

138