journal d'une transition

125

Later, somehow, I broke through this exhaustion because, to my question, comes only one answer and it is always the same: to build Matrimandir. You have given us Matrimandir to build, as soon as possible, and You will use it to receive and radiate Your Force, as You have said. And it is only Your Force that can help us out of the difficulty and bring the true change; left to ourselves we can only pull the thing down into semi-ignorance and damage Your work… This answer brings joy and a vast movement of progress with much quiet and strength: we must work towards the gathering of all of us on the city territory, whether in the green zones or near the Centre; we CAN work together; we have something to do together and this is the very means You have given us: we can build Matrimandir together, the Gardens together, the green zones together, the first functional buildings together. We can do it. This is our strength, the thing that has the power to reveal our unity upon earth, in spite of everything… It is towards that the efforts of the past year were tending, to form services, working teams… Only, it must happen on the ground of the battle, we must

physically gather in a concentrated area… The energy came back, we worked till 11 pm. The moon is full. I feel happy again.

*6-6-1977, Auroville: I keep thinking that if all of us here were really sincere, we would not need to reject anyone; our need of You would be so intense and constant that it would draw the power of Your truth-consciousness right here!

*12-6-1977, Auroville: … At about 7.30 am the village owners of that land I have unwittingly fenced across came to me; we went together to the spot and a long discussion followed; there was no marking-stone and the land had not been cultivated for very long. I said I’d first see our plot numbers. These people own several pieces of land, one of which is very near Matrimandir, and they want to sell them all at a very high rate. Later I went to see Shradhalu who explained the situation with land-purchase; the maximum allowed has already been purchased by the SAS and to purchase more requires a legal clearance of Auroville’s status, or else to take some risks in the names of individuals… So the only thing that remains is… to move the fence! Somehow it brings me back to a state of anxiety, of non-understanding or disagreement with what is taken as our present direction… At 9.15 am I went to Matrimandir; V. was already there. I was so preoccupied that at first I couldn’t work and she tried to help me formulate what I felt… It’s difficult…I don’t want only Satprem’s Auroville and I don’t want Navajata’s Auroville neither Shyamsunder’s… and neither mine! I want to respect the conditions laid by the Supreme in order for humanity – and the equilibrium of all the forces – to make the needed progress: that progress the Lord sees as needed, that He Himself needs! I don’t believe in the arguments used by the Aurovilians and I have no trust in the SAS either. I only feel on one hand a deep unity already there, since ever, with most of the people involved in Auroville’s independence, but no affinity with their mental positions; on the other hand I feel the imperative need that all the forces here may