My experience of Satprem

April 1973. “Divakar. Mother alone can say whether you are ready to come back. Your work on ‘Savitri’ is an excellent way of remaining in the atmosphere, on the condition that you only do it for yourself, without any idea of publication or any other result than the result within. I am no “quid” and I do not entertain correspondence. But all my wishes for you to live more and more sincerely and integrally in the Truth. Satprem.” I think that I must have then tried to “clarify” my intentions and complained a little of his coldness, to which Sujata responded, in terms that seemed to overpass her given capacity, that if I had indeed found Satprem’s reply cold, I would have found Mother’s glacial… This “misunderstanding” was the occasion of my first sense of inner unease, which worked a sort of adjustment of the distance: nobody, no one in the world could speak in Her Name – She alone knew, She alone knew my heart entirely and forever. In Mother, there was no judgment: Mother saw, loved, walked forward and carried. In Her presence for the world, in Her very body, there was no longer an ounce or a trace of the ego. However, time was passing, and Mother’s work was accelerating - and the battle within Her body too. At the beginning of 1973, I felt a sort of shift of the Action, as if Mother were enjoining all of us to make the conscious progress which would enable each one to find Her directly, without intermediary. Mother had alluded to the possibility of a sort of prolonged trance as a means and a method of sheltered concentration in order to neutralize the obstacles and the oppositions. This was Mother.

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