journal d'une transition

749

*10-9-1987, Auroville: Dutifully, at dawn, I attended the last part of Nar’s marriage ceremony, in a neon- lit, ugly apple-green hall packed with cackling ladies, rackety kids and men counting coins and notes: the utter vulgarity, senselessness and absence of dignity those affairs have become nowadays… *12-9-1987, Auroville: Ar. reported to me on the current discussions at Matrimandir; it seems that G.M is now an active part of a group of Roger A’s supporters, trying to finalise the design for the outer cover of the sphere, with plastic discs and other polyester stuff and all…: sad! … No one has come back to me, not even to inform me; but I suspect that my open concern for N, when no one there was at first willing to help him out, has woken up their pride and that they are now determined to settle it on their own, which is quite alright with me… I have no intention of pulling N any way; he will have to choose what he wants in his life… … I found a letter from J.Y’s wife, most bitter and unhappy, informing me that she had now asked him to leave her house on August 15…! She writes that she doesn’t even know his new address! *16-9-1987, Auroville: I have received one more – and last – negative answer from Janaka’s father: he will not contribute for “Ravena”; he is not interested in it. And there’s been no word from Sharan and Bhaga either; only strange, uneasy impressions… I have thought of asking yet one more thing from Janaka’s father: some Bank statements have come that show that there are still some $ 3,000/- in Janaka’s personal US Account; so I did write to the father asking him to instruct the Bank to send that amount here, so I can finish the work… … I have started to read F.J’s latest book – on Psychiatry; it is good; I have endless respect for his way: it is unique, and a self-giving of great and finest quality… If I had more family-sense, I’d very proud that he is my father! As it is, I take it as a Gift of the Grace, a truly natural flow and movement of It… *17-9-1987, Auroville: I could spend a moment with N at the Court today, where he had to be signed in for the next two weeks; it seems that the lawyer, who has been hired both by N’s brother-in-law and the family of the other accused, will put in an application for bail tomorrow… And this afternoon, I brought him biddies and fruit at the Prison; now the Superintendent invites me to sit at his desk, and they bring N over to me and they all smile, and this is the sweet, unique face of India… *18-9-1987, Auroville: Ar. hasn’t been coming so much lately, she was busier with Ritam. She came after dinner last night; this is a much happier rhythm this way, ii makes for a more joyful meeting, like sharing with my sister the odd, funny, interesting things we each have come upon… At Matrimandir it seems that G.M has made himself the main pawn of Roger A, along with his new friends, Louis C, El, etc, and they are working